SPR and its Issues According to Yasuhara:
by My.Changeling
Summary: When Mai tells Naru she loves him he responds by saying one of the most confusing things Yasuhara has ever heard. So, a couple months after Naru returns from England he hatches a plan to get them together. One list. Nine numbers. Total NaruxMai. R


**Disclaimer: **Sadly, I don't own Ghost Hunt. Yes, people, I know I said I couldn't update. And I can't. This idea just struck me and lucky you, I hadn't left yet. SO enjoy this little story while I'm away.

this is a mini story reflecting on _my _noticing the fact that SPR has issues. And a lot of them. Who knew a list could do so much good?

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**SPR and its Issues According to Yasuhara:**

_When worse comes to worse... Make a list!:_

Yasuhara sat back and reviewed his list of issues that he'd noticed SPR had contracted over the years he'd known them. Mai and Naru were still playing that 'I know I love you but I'm too prideful for this' game. Well Naru was. Mai was still in the dumps after he'd, rudely at that, told her that she really loved Gene.

He didn't know if Naru was using reverse psychology or what but Yasu really wanted to strangle him after he'd left Mai to cry her eyes out. _And _to make matters worse, everyone else, excluding the idiot himself (Just in case you're confused, we're talking about Naru here) knew perfectly well that Naru was in love with Mai. Except the aforementioned idiot and the lovely girl known as Mai Taniyama.

Yasu was hoping that this little list would bring them together, so when he heard Naru and Mai approach the office he started reading his list out loud.

**1. Naru and his issues are going to catch up with him someday. ** One of them being his many aliases. But Naru has a lot of untouched issues that could be painful to just mention.... Like the fact that he has a sick mind. For instance: "Is it me you love? Or Gene?" What kind of question is THAT?! They guy is dead. DEAD. Sure, she might have some fellow feelings for the dead dude but really? Someone needed therapy...

**2. Lin and his issues already have.** In fact, he bumped his head on the doorway just yesterday. _Way _too tall for his own good. Oh and he was bound to contract carpal tunnel _some _time. And he doesn't eat! Ever.

**3. Mai and her issues involve Naru's issues catching up with him.** She's bound to let at least _one _of his aliases slip while confessing she's madly in love with **him **not his **brother **who is **dead.**

**4. Bou-san's issues involve Ayako's painful slaps.** One of these days she's going to give him a concussion. OR WORSE!! A coma.

**5. Ayako's issues involve Bou-san's loud mouth and her lack of ability to exorcise spirits.** One of these days his mouth is going to give him a concussion. OR WORSE!! A coma. And some lessons in exorcising are in order.

**6. Masako's issues involve falling out windows.** They should've left her there. Yasu could've sworn she'd developed a case of defenestraphobia.*

**7. John's issues involve priesthood and how he has people that work with him that have WAY too many issues.** That _was _his overall job was it not? Helping people. Well he wasn't doing that great of a job in Yasu's opinion. Maybe some counseling was in order?

**8. Madoka's issues involve Lin's issues having caught up with him.** She had to bandage his head. The only problem was the fact that she _still _hasn't found a stool tall enough to reach his head. She's also getting him a doctor's appointment for that pesky carpal tunnel.

**9. Yasu's issues involve Naru's issues of not admitting that he's deeply in love with Mai. He seriously needs to get over himself and just kiss her like he knows he wants to. **

Yasu was hanging his list up on the wall when he was interrupted by someone clearing their throats. He turned around in his spinny chair Mai had bought him the other day. Well, by bought, he meant he'd taken her wallet and gone on an insane office spending spree. He saw Naru's impassive face and Mai's curious one. He grinned, his mind hatching a plan.

"Yasu," Mai asked. Naru raised his eyebrows, noticing the last one on the list. "What is this?"

Yasu rubbed the back of his head. "Well, it's the truth. Naru are you philemaphobic* towards Mai?"

Naru blinked. "No."

Mai looked at Yasu bewildered as to what he was getting at. "What does that mean?"

Naru rolled his eyes as if it was the easiest definition in the world. "It means-"

"So!" Yasuhara clapped his hands together. "Then why is it you haven't kissed her yet?"

"Wha-what?!" Mai stuttered.

Bou-san, Ayako, John, Masako, Lin and Madoka walked back in from their lunch break, watching the scene unfold.

"I simply haven't because-"

"You're afraid!" Yasu cried, catching them all of guard. "You love Mai and you're too stupid to admit it!!"

Naru backed up a little. "I am not stupid."

"PSH!" Yasu rolled his eyes. "You, Kazuya Shibuya also known as Naru otherwise known as Noll also known as Oliver Davis also known as JERK are totally and completely stupid when it comes to Mai!"

Maybe it was the candy he'd eaten earlier but he was feeling rather.... rambunctious today.

"Excuse me?" Naru narrowed his eyes.

Yasu grinned. "I bet you wouldn't kiss her cause you're too scared!!"

Mai's eyes widened as she watched Naru's gaze darken. He didn't like being challenged. On the sidelines, Lin bet Takigawa five bucks Naru would kiss her in the span of five seconds while Masako was glaring at Mai and John was sighing. Ayako looked at the list and narrowed her eyes. What did he mean by her lack of ability to exorcise spirits was shocking?!

Mai yelped in surprise as Naru spun her around, drawing her into a kiss. It was around ten seconds before they broke.

Naru turned to smirk at Yasu when he realize what he'd just done. He froze, looking at Mai's expression. His heart was relieved to find that she approved.

"So you really do love me and not Gene." He whispered.

"Well duh!" Everyone yelled.

Ayako rolled her eyes. "Seriously. You're so dense."

Naru glared at her and turned away but not before saying his signature line: "Mai. Tea."

"Oh." He said, pausing at the door. "I want to talk to you about that list of yours Yasu. Don't think you're off the hook."

Yasu sweatdropped. With great lists came great consequences.

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Ah, I hoped y'all like it. Read and Review for me!!

*defenstraphobia: The fear of windows, being thrown out windows, things being thrown out windows and- well you get the gist.

**philemaphobic: The fear of kissing. (could you imagine Naru with a fear of kissing? Well, now that you mention it, **I **can.)


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